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"It'll Be Faster If I Do It Myself" And Other Lies That Lead to Burnout
- Carolon Donnally
- Jul 3
- 3 min read
Updated: Jul 21
Ever find yourself thinking, “It’ll be faster if I do it myself”? That one thought, acted on enough times, can become a fast track to burnout. Lately, I’ve heard leaders who are trying to hand off more responsibility say some version of: “I know I need to delegate better, but it’s just so hard.” They know they need to delegate more. The part that often gets overlooked is how much past experiences with delegation shape their willingness to try again.
Why delegation feels risky
For many of us, there is a disconnect between what we know we need to do and what we actually do. That disconnect may be rooted in memories of times when delegation did not work. Someone missed the mark, dropped the ball, or let us down. Whether we want to admit it or not, we may begin seeing current team members through the lens of those old disappointments.
So we end up doing too much ourselves. Or hovering so closely that we might as well be doing it ourselves. That is not delegation. It is frustrating for you and for the person you are trying to support.
Delegation doesn't fall apart because people are lazy or incompetent. Sometimes it falls apart because expectations were unclear, unspoken, or understood differently by each person.
Start by reflecting on what happened before
Before you delegate again, take a few minutes to look back at your past experiences:
What would have made the difference last time?
Were you clear about what was needed and why?
How did you check for understanding?
Did you agree on what success would look like?
These questions are about finding the gap, not assigning blame.
Then think about the person in front of you now
Every delegation situation is different, and every person is different.
Slow down and think about the person taking this on:
What are their current capabilities?
How are they feeling about the responsibility?
What excites them about the opportunity?
What concerns or fears do they have?
How much guidance do they need and want?
What would that support look like for them?
This does not mean giving someone work they are not ready for and hoping for the best. It means being honest about what they can handle now, what they may be ready to learn, and what support will make success more likely.
The step most leaders skip entirely
The question that changes everything
Ask the other person what they expect of you. Most leaders never ask this. But delegation is not just about handing off work. It is also about building trust, creating clarity, and giving people the support they need to step up and succeed.
The next time you delegate, especially to someone new, don't just give directions. Set expectations. Name what you need. And ask what they need in return. Then follow up. Check in. See what is working and what is not. Trust grows when both people understand what they are responsible for and what support is available.
Take action
Pick one thing on your plate right now. Who could do it, with the right support? What would they need from you to succeed? Start there.
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If leaders in your organization are struggling to delegate, develop others, or let go of work they have been carrying for too long, telling them to “delegate more” is not enough. Carolon Donnally Consulting helps organizations strengthen the leadership practices, team systems, and shared expectations that make delegation more effective and sustainable.
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Carolon Donnally, MSOD, PCC
Burnout Resistance Coach · Trainer · Strategic Organization Consultant
Carolon helps high-achieving leaders and mission-driven organizations do great work without burning themselves or others out. She is a former Head of Leadership Coaching at the IRS, holds an MSOD from Pepperdine University, and is an ICF PCC credentialed coach. Her work is grounded in 20+ years of real-world experience — and her own experience on the other side of burnout.
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